The old man at the bar was wondering:
“You got any party tricks?”
Well, sir, I’ve got a thumb that can take me anywhere.
Through high school summers, my thumbs carried me
Through the desert like landscape of western Turkey:
Hot asphalt, summer wind, rocky roads.
A treasure box of memories I owe to my past chauffeurs,
Strangers who gracefully lean on their breaks at the sight of a thumb,
Extending from the sidewalk like overgrown branches.
I find myself visiting the past at times,
Transported through deja vu: my fingers brushing against a ball.
Transformed through deja vu: a young girl in braids and a worn out jersey.
Bloody knees. Dirty elbows. My father’s son.
After the game I hold the world between two hands;
The whole wide world on paper, an encyclopaedia of maps.
Destiny drags my fingers through the pages:
My thumb lands across the Atlantic Ocean.
I pack up my life: pants and belts, books and glasses.
Trinkets and two thumbs.
At the border I press my fingers onto the screen,
My fingerprints etched forever in America’s memory.
Diners and Sunday Night Football settle into the background of my life.
My dreams are in English but I hear myself mumble in my mother tongue at night.
The American Dream weighs heavily on my shoulders at times,
My thumbs entangled in the strings of star spangled hopes - America feels like a mean lover.
I know I won’t leave.
On cloudy days I remember all the easier lives there are to live.
I won’t contest; the path of least resistance is painfully inviting.
When I’m high God tells me he stitched my soul inside this body
Not to whistle through the soft green grass
But instead walk through gravel and thorns,
Here only to live and watch sweet chaos unfold.
After all, my poor mother found early on
I would only ever do the opposite of what I’m told.
Ink soaked pen against my thumb
I hunched over my desk as a child,
Perfecting recipes for seaweed potions and molotov cocktails.
Cold glass bottle against my thumb
I had my first sip of champagne,
Two days old, like royalty in a chateau.
Years ago I fought my way out of my mother;
Screaming, impatient, untimely.
Through the bloody darkness I pushed my way into the world
Thumbs sticking out, ready for my next destination.